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Unconditional Satisfaction GuaranteeNo Shipping Fees Above 302 Months to Decide. Returns Simplified.The second in a series of crystal balls that came from none other than the heavens above, delivered to the doorsteps of Paradise by some plant alien’s green hands!
Sometimes first isn’t always the best. No. 2 has many benefits! You learn from the first’s mistakes and get to do things like settle down with an overbearing but really hot wife… well ok bad example.
Maybe you’ll have a couple of kids who will ascend to higher levels than you at their age, have silly non-canonical mooostaches everyone makes fun of, and finally realize you’ll never be the best so it’s betterto Go Home and be a Family Man.
That’s ok, because when you see No. 1 being a dead beat dad who’s never home, abandoning his wife and kids at the drop of a dime leaving her to raise them all alone while going on crazy zany adventures, and all around an illiterate idiot you can’t help but smirk to yourself that maybe you don’t have it so bad. No 2.could be a wise choice indeed 🙂
